foxy lady...

apparently i not only can endure 3 days of unmedicated labor, complete 3 half marathons and make pad thai... but i also can rescue our cat from a snarling beast.

ok... it wasn't snarling...

but quincy almost died and i saved him.

period.

(.)

a few weeks ago i had awoken around midnight to leif falling out of bed in some strange manner.  after rubbing his back and getting him back to sleep, i asked my man if quincy had come in yet for the night.  he sleepily told me no and rolled over to go back to sleep.

quincy not coming in at night is to be expected around this time of year.  sometimes he refuses to come in during the warmer months when we beckon him at dusk.  he's lucky i've either been a nursing mama or pregnant the past few years and have get up every few hours throughout most nights.  he gets second and third chances frequently to come in.

so it's not unusual for quincy to be out do god-knows-what during the wee hours of the morning.

i went out on our front porch and clapped.

that's how we call him.

we clap about 10 times really loud and then call his name.  i'm sure it drives the neighbors insane.  (i don't really know why our cat comes to a clap... but kjaer discovered this quickly after he brought him home from the cold, hard streets of aurora... colfax to be precise.) so, we clap.  i usually give him a few minutes to abandon the poor mouse he's been torturing and hop a few fences to get home.

anyways...  i'm standing there in the dark... with this gut feeling that i need to wait a couple more minutes... when all of the sudden i see a fox run past our house in the middle of the street.

i had two thoughts:

woa!  cool!  a fox!

then...

crap!... a fox!

i wonder if quincy is nearby and the fox spotted him! 

so i walked to the end of the driveway to get a better peak at what the fox was up to... because now that i knew a fox was out and about i couldn't leave my cat out there (at least until i was sure the fox wasn't after him).  the fox had stopped cold in front of this house about 3 doors down and across the street.  he was staring at something... though i didn't know what, and looking curiously at me.

all of the sudden, he turned and ran a couple more houses down... and here comes quincy, bounding out from underneath a car and chasing after him.

dumbass cat

i'm sorry... i can't really think of another word to describe our brave and valiant feline.  he thinks he's soooooo tough that he can go after his own predator.

well, the minute i saw quincy's fluffy tail chase after that fox i freaked.  this was a pretty good sized fox (about the height of my dog who weighs 45 pounds)... and i knew it could easily take quincy out.

so then i was a dumbass

i don't know why i thought it would be a good idea, but i called quincy again...

clap, clap, clap

quincy immediately stopped his pursuit and turned around

i then saw the error of my ways... because once his back was turned to the fox, i KNEW he was in trouble.  and what made it worse... it was my fault!  at least before i clapped quincy was keenly aware of where the fox was.  but now he was distracted and i was the idiot who did it.

he then proceeded to walk....

W A L K

up the street to me.

now you have to understand... he was about three or four houses down the street and he's taking a sunday stroll up to me... like, oh hey mom, you rang?  i was just out, chasing foxes and stuff.  what's up?  did you see me chase that fox off?  he won't be messing with the kirkegaard's anymore!  it was such a proud little strut that he was doing... and isn't pride always such a thief?  his pride was about to cost him.

meanwhile, ol' foxy loxy starts stalking him from behind.

i didn't know how i was going to explain to my husband, who loves that cat more than anything, that it was my fault our cat got eaten by a fox because he had to turn around a brag to me.

if my cat could speak human i would have screamed RRRRUUUUUUUNNNNNN STUPID!

but quincy doesn't speak human... that or he pretends not to understand...
which is also pretty likely.

so i bolted down the street and scooped up my adoring, purring feline... who seemingly had forgotten that he had just been playing cat and mouse with a fox.  when i looked up, the fox was about 10 feet away and still on the prowl.  so i started power walking back up to my house, reprimanding quincy the whole way.

you almost were toast!

(nervous glance over the shoulder... yup, still a fox)

what were you thinking?

(another nervous glance... DUDE!  IS HE STILL FOLLOWING ME?)

when i got to the front door, that fox had followed me all of the way up to the grass in our front yard.  i'm not sure if he was planning on snatching quincy from my arms, or if he just wanted to see where that feisty little cat lived.  either way... quincy and i made it into the house... quincy totally oblivious to what had just gone down.

i deadbolted the door and stood there holding my adorable, idiot cat with adrenaline pumping through my veins.  i couldn't believe what had just happened.  i went into the bedroom and tossed quincy onto kjaer, loudly proclaiming I JUST SAVED OUR CATS LIFE!

so there you have it.  i'm a freakin' hero.  i stared a fox dead in the eyes whilst holding a fluffy appetizer for him and won.

but let's hope that's the last time i ever have to do that again.