here's the deal... lucille...

well, i'm sure you were all just sitting at your computers with bated breath since my post that i was off to find a doula and a new doctor... right?

no??

well, for those of you who were... or those of you who might be the least bit interested... 

here's the new gig.  

we interviewed doulas through the end of december, early january.  actually, we only met a couple face to face and had several phone and email conversations with other doulas.  but, after i met Whitney, i was sold.  i felt like meeting the other ones face to face would be a waste of both of our time.  

the whole process was rather educational (doulas are wise, wise women... i highly recommend using one if you'd like to deliver vaginally... even if you think you'd want pain meds) and i've learned so much in the past 8 weeks that i never knew before.  i was still rather hesitant about changing doctors because i was so close to the end of my pregnancy.  but every doula i met with either recommended it or told me rather frankly that the VBAC clients who stayed with their dr.'s almost always wished after the delivery that they had switched because they had to fight for what they wanted.  

one dr. i met with in december that had been recommended didn't really help either.  you could tell he was really good at what he did... but he wasn't very touchy feely.  ummm... hello.  this is monica we're talking about.  the girl who still tries to hold her husbands hand every two minutes after 9 years of being together.  so when i left his office i felt like he'd be a good dr., but he hadn't convinced me to switch.  i liked my gregarious dr. way more than him... even if i knew deep down she was going to c-section me.  

in the process of meeting and talking over email and the phone with all of these doulas... two places kept coming up.  because all of these women, who don't really work with each other, kept mentioning these two places, i decided to check them out.  one was dr. breeden... a doctor at St. Lukes who is well known for successful VBACS.  (by the way... i'm including links because perhaps someone out there might want to try for a VBAC in the Denver area and i think providing this information is helpful).  The other place was the Midwifery at Denver Health.  

so january was spent awaiting the arrival of these appointments and making a decision.  Dr. Breeden and his personality just blew us out of the water.  he was so warm and caring.  i could easily see him as my dr.  when i asked him what his success rate was... he thought about 50% of the women who attempted a VBAC were successful with him.  Those are pretty good odds compared to most dr.'s.  

i still had the midwifery to look at later that week, so we didn't commit.  

however, for the first time in 9 months, i felt HOPE.  

dr. breeden made me feel like the ideal candidate and he had so much faith in VBACs and the way a woman's body is designed to birth the baby she grew.  kjaer and i left in a state of euphoria.  in fact, we were so thrilled that we'd have a chance to actually labor with this baby, we stopped at a taphouse and each got a celebratory beer.  (don't worry some of you ladies out there, it's safe to have a beer at this point in my pregnancy... and man, was it good!)

the midwifery at denver health was great.  i'd have to say that i was a little jaded because i had a heck-of-a time getting down there (that will be saved for another blog because now it's just a hilarious story).  i was 1/2 an hour late and they waited to close their office for me.  so i didn't get to spend as much time with them as i wanted.  HOWEVER... their stats were even better than dr. breedens.  their c-section rate has never gone higher than 6% over the years (unheard of in the states... our national average is currently at 30% and climbing) and they are consistently 1st, 2nd or 3rd in the nation for successful VBACS.  no matter how warm and fuzzy dr. Breeden was... i just couldn't beat those numbers.  

i guess i'm a numbers gal.

so i've officially switched... 2 1/2 weeks away and i'm switched.

i kind of half expected a disappointed phone call from my OB who i was just so sad to leave, begging me to come back.  but it seems no one over there really cares... apparently this kind of thing happens all of the time.  and apparently i was the only one who was sad to say goodbye.  

now i'm sure a few of you are clutching your chests because you're picturing my hippie-midwife on a stool out in a field catching my baby while i sway with flowers woven through my hair.  but rest easy, i actually will labor at denver health in the labor unit with dr's and an operating room down the hall... literally.  so in the very unlikely event that something should go wrong, i'm in a hospital that is set up to work with emergency surgeries.  the midwife would simply transfer my care to a dr. and i'd get a c-section.  

but let me say this... if i DO get a c-section... i will know at the bottom of my heart that i did EVERYTHING i could to deliver vaginally and that will be that.  no more wondering (like i have so many times with leif) if the dr. had just let me go another couple of days, would i have gone into labor on my own.... or feeling backed into a corner by a conservative dr. who didn't trust my body to do what it was made to do.  this time if i get a c-section, it will be because i absolutely needed one for my safety or the baby's and not for any other reason.  

so that's the plan, stan.  i'm going for it.  i'm going to try to bring this baby into this world the way i feel God intended for me to.  and beside me i'll have a midwife, an amazing doula and most importantly... my champion of a husband.  i'm up for the challenge (i always did like to set big goals for myself... like half marathons, losing 60 pounds... and then meeting those goals).  

so now that the clock is winding down (a little over two weeks until my due date) we'll all just have to sit back, relax and wait for baby K2 to make his or her grand appearance... whatever way God has planned for them to enter this world.  

we're here, we're ready and we can't wait to meet you!